haha great post, and I totally understand. Glad you have found your place in the great white north. And thank you for your service.
I know you haven't had the Falkens on too long yet. Thoughts on road noise? Road handling vs LTX?
No more road noise than the Michelin had, even with my hearing aids in
Your correct haven't had them long enough to make a good call on handling but so far I am impressed with gravel and pavement. Real test will be snow and off road. But I am cautiously optimistic at this point. I'm starting to think all the good things people have said about them is true. But I have to see for myself.
There's this thing I heard about called, "snow bird".
My Mom and her sig-other would head on down to Arizona from Tahoe in the winter.
In your little shots of problems in different states, you forgot to add California with our earthquakes (and political climate....)
Oh those aren't my memes they have been floating around since that Ben Franklin fellow invented the internet! Never seen one with California and earthquakes but surprised haven't. In San Diego I was rocked to sleep on the ships many nights by light ones.
I could go to Scottsdale, Az. in the winter lots of people I work with, and retires as well, do and we have a hospital there. And Jax, Florida. Not sure they would let me into California though at least with the bumper sticker on the Taco.

I'd have to take the GX to get across the California border.