a few thoughts......
did this problem exist when you bought the truck? did the seller mention it? why was the trans fluid changed right before you got it? who did it? why was it low? .......
then some more: you should never shift your transmission into any other gear when you're waiting at a light. i know the old wife's tail about using more fuel and whatnot. it's a bunch of bs. the torque converter in your transmission is designed to allow you to sit still while in gear. you're not doing any harm by leaving it in gear. actually, you're doing more harm by shifting it into neutral and then back into gear when you're ready to go. why you ask? well, everytime an automatic transmission shifts, it either engages a clutch pack or a band by applying hydraulic pressure via the valve body ( and on late model transmissions, via sending current to a shift solenoid ). just like any other friction material ( like a standard clutch ), everytime you engage said material, you generate heat due to friction and you cause a tiny bit of wear on the friction material. repeat this and over time, you can cause significant extra wear which in turn will cause the transmission to require work sooner than it should.
so just leave it in gear at the stop light............
as for shift solenoids, they typically either work or they do not. however, they can slowly plug up with foreign material. a shift solenoid is basically an electrical coil with a ball valve in the middle. send current thru the coil and it generates a magnetic field. this in turn causes the ball to travel towards the magnetic field. depending on the style of the solenoid, this can either open or close a passage, used to control fluid flow in an automatic transmission.
since the coil becomes a magnet, it can't differentiate between items it attracts. so it'll suck in the check-ball and other metal objects it can attract. that includes small metal particles suspended in the transmission fluid. pretty much the same stuff you found on your pan magnet. see where i'm going with this? the inside of the solenoids commonly gets clogged up with this fine metal and cancause the solenoids to stick. oftentimes they're more likely to do so when the transmission has some miles on it and when it's cold. clearances are tighter and things get stuck easier.
but late model autos are'nt just controlled by the solenoids themselves. the solenoids receive a signal via the wiring harness thru the ecm. the computer needs input from a number of sensors to determine what to do and when to shift. if the computer does not have enough input, it may not send the "proper" signal. so you could have a problem with your MLPS switch, vss or toehr sensors.
then we get to "the cable". this is called a TV cable. short for Trottle Valve cable. it's responsible for shift timing and firmess. the later the transmissionshifts, the firmer it shifts. all of this is a function of the throttle valve itself. adjusting the cable essentially adjusts the valves' position relative to the bore it resides in. this valve can also be the cluprit. it's a common issue in th700 transmissions. the clearances for this valve and it's bore are extremely tight so no fluid can bleed by. if any foreignmaterial ( like a small piece of clutch material or a metal fragment ) gets stuck between the bore and valve, it can and will cause the valve to hang up. that in turn will affect shift timing, firmness as well as downshifting. so it could be the culprit.
here's what i would do: first off, have a professional shop put a scanner on the truck and run a diagnostic test. if any of the solenoids have an issu ( even intermitten ), then the computer will remember it and bring it to the scanners' attention via a "memory code". if the scan yields no codes, then you can pretty much rule out the solenoids.
do as much homework and diagnostic work before "throwing parts at the problem" or tearing into the rig. at this point, it could be a transmission problem, either electgrical or mechanical. it could also be a non-transmission ralated issue, like the drive flange mentioned earlier.
hth
georg @ valley hybrids
ps: i believe rostra makes aftermarket solenoinds for the 440 and 442. if so, then i can get them for a good price for you. if not, then you're limited to good used or brand new oem units.