I AM A GENIUOS. JEENIUUS. GEENYISS WELL, I'M PURDY SMART -I was sitting around yesterday morning, bemoaning the wretched state my TLC is currently in. I was going over the hours I have spent cleaning, sanding, painting, scraping, grinding and bolting on parts (taking parts back off and bolting them on right), when a thought occurred to me!!! I said to myself "Hey smart guy, what is the dirtiest, crummiest, rather get a kick in the nads job associated with this Face-Lift" project you have worked on so far"? "Bed liner removal" was my muted reply. Seez me again "Hey Genius, why are you wasting all of this time doing things the hard way?" "Use your head". "Be smart".."How can you do this better"...? "Easier"....? "Less work"??????!!!!......
Now it is a proven scientific fact of nature that in order to find the easiest solution to an otherwise unsavory job or a complex and insanely difficult task, you simply seek out the laziest person you know and ask "How would you do it"?.....This is known as The "laws of quantum laziness". The 1st and only Law of Quantum Laziness states, "For every task there is an equal and opposite lazy way to solve it". Having no shortage of shiftless and directionless friends, I deduced that my most difficult task would be determining which of these reprobate characters would be the laziest person I know. So, with some difficulty, I whittled my rather lengthy list down to a half a dozen or so likely candidates. I was able to reach all by phone...All except for one.Hmmmm, I was on to something..Reasoning that if "he" was to lazy to answer the phone, he might just be the one I was looking for..This was my man....
So, I fired up the old FJC and headed over to my long time associate and hunting buddy "River lot Dave's" (RLD for short) house...Knowing he was too lazy to lock the door, I pushed in the screen and walked in...I found "River Lot" stretched out in his recliner, a half eaten slice of Pizza in one hand and a half empty bottle of "Bud" in the other. No doubt Saturday brunch. Judging by the empties nestled on the end table, I reasoned this was not the 1st "beverage" of the morning. Without looking up from his mid morning communion with "DR Phil", river lot says "want a beer"? Vowing long ago never to drink before 9:00AM ever again, I politely declined. River Lot may be lazy but he is a gracious host.
"What's up?" was his next question..."I tried to call you" was my opening salvo. "I know" was his pizza chewing reply. As if sensing my incredulous look he followed up with "I was watching DR Phil". RLD is a Jedi master of communication.....Hmmmm, lazy men are so cagey!!! I would have to be at the top of my game if I was going to succeed. Sensing my opening after a particularly long belch, I jumped in. I explained in simple terms using short phrases interspersed with grunts, curses and several hand and arm gestures, my conundrum with the bed liner removal. After an unusually lengthy Tampon commercial I figured it was "now or never", DR Phil was on till 1000 and I needed answers now so I blurted out the million dollar question to RLD.."How would you do it"?
What came out of his mouth was pure, 100% lazy man liquid gold...."Git Fred to do it", was his instantaneous reply. Brilliant, frigging pure crystalline unadulterated brilliance!!!! I left "River Lot" digging for some unseen infestation and headed out the door.
"Fred" or "Drop Dead Fred" as he is affectionately called by the boys down at the mattress factory, isn't really a "Fred" at all. Stephen is his Christian name. "Drop Dead Fred" or "Fred" is a moniker given to him to emphasize his "Devilishly handsome appearance" ...or maybe not....
I immediately dialed up "Fred"....
"Hello. Fred? "Yeah". Need some work? "Yeah". Can you work today? "Yeah" I need to start ASAP, you sure you can come now? "Yeah" You sure? "Yeah"?
"Fred" is a man of immediate action and not prone to idle chatting..Two hours later, he shows up...Sensing that unbridled anger is not the emotional response that will instill superior craftsmanship out of "Fred" I shrug and say "No worries"......I then explain in exquisite detail our (his) mission for the day. "Ever use one of these" (Gasket scrapper)? "Yeah". "One of these" (Grinding wheel with wire brush)? "Yeah" . How about this (Bigger gasket scrapper)? "Yeah"...Ok, great, I knew I had my man....."Say Fred, I am going to run down to the 7-11 for a Slim Jim and a Red Bull, need anything"..."Yeah" "Pack of smokes?" I inquire. "Yeah".........
As I pulled away I could hear the rapid staccato of the grinding wheel as it skipped happily over the tub of my TLC...Now, Like I said.....I'm a JEEN-EE-OOSE.
I will now accept your heart felt accolades..
All these things happened just the way I described it. Anyway, that's the way I remember it.
As you said, "Live and learn". 
as far as the "tech side", but !!!????
(see below) while plotting my next move on the face-lift...Headed to the paint shop to check on the progress..Hood/fender repaint to "hot rod black"...May be able to "git it buttoned up" this weekend (read started)!!!
