Readiness achieved!!!
I reviewed the ECU wiring diagram and found out that the OP either had a different year or something (mine is a '96) - my relay was running off the VSV circuit, but on the FPR side, which would activate at different times. Found out the VSV (EGR) circuit was one wire over (#22).
Rebuilt as outlined below, adding a 100ohm resistor on the coil activation to prevent fluttering of the relay when the idle sensor switches on and and off (low voltage signals running through the ECU were flipping the relay on and off and I was worried about burning out the relay).
Drove around today and finally got ECU ready and no CEL after about an hour or so of driving! Leaving this relay in place would continue to tell the ECU what it wants to see as far as the EGR system is concerned. For me this was a temporary fix that will allow me to verify that the ECU was correctly handling signals from the EGR system. Now on to troubleshooting what's realy wrong with my EGR system.
Note: in this solution, the EGR sensor is DISCONNECTED, as the relay/resistor unit provides the ECU all info that it needs.