Sorry, but it sounds like your local parts guy is sending you in the wrong direction.$$$
This sounds like a classic case of the 3fe ECU relay problem.
I don't have the part number but your parts guy should have it, and it should cost about $11.00.
My understanding is that this relay gets hot and does not want to engage when hot. The problem seems to be the gage of wire not being large enough going to the relay at least thats what I've read. So people replace the wiring some like me just get a extra GPS brand relay that seems to tolorate heat better.
When this happened to me for the first time I pulled the relay with a rag (very hot) and cooled it off with some good old h2o plugged it back in and drove off. Now I just carry spares.
The ECU relay is located under the hood drivers side fire wall in the black box, it supplys power to your ECU so if its out your check engine light will not funtion nether will your injectors or spark plugs.
Oh, welcome to the board and do a search on this, newbie!!