Now that I am older and hate most everyone that I have ever met...
LMAO!
only advice that I would give is to get something that is
A/from a known company, lincoln/hobart/miller
B/capable of being converted to gas
I bought a cheapo, and it does what I need to do, but it can't be converted to gas at all. also I learned welding in college (auto body) and worked in a shop for a while, so I can probably work around my cheapy's limitations better than someone just starting out.
I would stay away from private sale used, since you don't know how to try it out, but some welding shops have units that have been traded in, and they will have been checked over, also some rental places sell their used units.
IMHO, the biggest 110v unit is the way I'd go