Livin’ the Dream … The Diaries of a Madman

[KOWBOY]

Watched the sun go down on one side of me and then the moon come up on the other. Here’s the moon over the mesa.

 

[KOWBOY]

Thursday, 15 May 2014

Early sunshine this mornin’. Nice to have it comin’ thru the windows as I made breakfast and cleaned-up. Cheerful way to start the day. Now gotta try to wedge that damned awnin’ in here. My plan worked.

Snapped a coupla more pics of the crazy bends in the river on my way out. Really is a neat sight. Gotta be a half dozen of them bends visible from this park.

Then eased on down the road. The rattlin’ of that awnin’ stickin’ into the cab was mind-numbingly aggravatin’. Only a few miles to Mexican Hat tho so maybe I can find a big ol’ dumpster. Nope. Or the next town neither. Or the next one. Had evil thoughts of just chunkin’ the thang on the side of the road in the desert or dumpin’ it behind some empty buildin’. But I just ain’t that a way. Some right pretty scenery tho. Here’s the classic shot of Monument Valley. Same backdrop for half the ol’ western movies ever made.

125 miles from my camp site, I seen a sign in Tuba City, AZ for a solid waste transfer station. Perfect. Pulled on in and legally gave my dead awnin’ a proper burial in a dumpster. My ears are still ringin’ from the racket.

Some brutal country just south of Tuba City. Looks like the surface of the moon. But then ya get on to the Coconino National Forest as ya climb on into Flagstaff. Made another stop for more beer and a few vittles and then headed south towards Mormon Lake. Sure good to smell the smell of the mountains again.

And now I’m here. Parked next to 5 other trucks with Hallmark campers on ‘em in the Hallmark spot in the vender section at the Overland Expo. A gatherin’ for the “Adventure Traveler”. A lotta cool rigs here already and the gig don’t start ‘till tomorrow. I came here cuz the owner of Hallmark, Mr. Bill Ward, asked me to. I’m hearin’ the event has lots of classes on dif’rent stuff and supposed to be a whole lotta vendors here. I sure ain’t gonna take no classes on nuthin’ but it should be fun to go ‘round to the vendors. Reckon prob’ly bought stuff from most of ‘em already. But I was pretty happy up around Moab and this sorta deal ain’t really my cup of tea … so I’m approachin’ it with my normal negative attitude. But we’ll see.

First surprise was to hear my name hollered out as soon as I pulled into camp. And it was none other than Tim Bleau of Iron Pig Off Road. He was in the vendor spot next door with a coupla other fellas representin’ americanadventurist.com.

 

[KOWBOY]

Monday, 19 May

Event actu’ly turned out to be a fun time. Imagine you have a pretty cool stamp. A postage stamp. And then you’re invited to attend a huge stamp collector’s event for free. And you could sit there and display your stamp for all to see as they went by. That’s what type of deal this was. And I showed up with a pretty cool stamp.

So Friday and Saturday I stayed in Hallmark’s vendor spot and talked to all the folks that wanted to take a look-see at the campers. Here’s a shot of the backside of our encampment. The main roadway for all the customer traffic was just on the other side. We were pretty well wedged in there. Had a great spot in the trees. Got pretty hot and windy below us in the open area.

I enjoyed all the conversations and offered some real world advice now that I been livin’ in one of ‘em. And was drinkin’ beer most of the time to boot. Lots of folks came by and I was workin’ the crowd hard. I liked it. A lot.

One unexpected, humungous bonus was all the folks that came into our area and recognized my junk and wanted to meet me cuz’ of all this crap I write. Like I said right from the get-go … I do this for my own enjoyment. But it’s kinda like bein’ the midnight DJ on an AM radio show … sometimes ya just can’t help but wonder if’n anybody’s really out there listenin’. So to all you fine folks that took time outta your day to shake my hand and say they read all this … I thank you. It was gratifyin’. Very gratifyin’. And a special thanks to Mr. Christo Slee who dropped by to look at my junk. The man was a great help in gettin’ me started in this lifestyle many years ago … on one of my false starts.

But my junk wasn’t even the biggest hit of our camp. No sir. That title goes to the younger Ward brother Andy and his Pimp Daddy Ghetto Cruiser. Takes a special kinda sickness to do this to a 2015 Duramax Denali with 40 miles on it. That’s right … a 2015. First one in the Denver area.

You believe Toyo makes the same tire I got in a 40 for a friggin’ 24” rim?? Check out the gen-u-ine, imitation beadlocks and the spiked lug nuts.

The Pimp Daddy Ghetto Cruiser’s got more stuff hangin’ down then an ol’ stud bull. IFS rocks!!

And the rear suspension is now all air. Amazin’.

I gotta say that I respect the hell outta Andy’s sense of humor tho. Boy’s arms are bigger than my legs and he most certainly coulda just whooped my ass at his convenience. And believe me when I tell ya … I was just relentless the entire weekend over his truck. Much to the amusement of father Bill and older brother Matt. I promised I was gonna post it up. And now I done did. Cheers to ya Andy.

 

[KOWBOY]

Friday night I spent the evenin’ with the fine folks at Aluminess in their vendor spot drinkin’ some of Kenny’s home brew that’s rigged up so the tap is in one of their bumpers. Good to see them folks again.

Then I gotta incredible surprise yesterday mornin’ when the Wards stripped the awnin’ and brackets off one of the brand new display campers and put it on my junk.

And they wouldn’t even let me pay for it. I sure hope some of them fine folks I talked to buy a camper or two. I sure tried my best. And this was their thank you to me in return for my efforts. I’d say I was overpaid.

I knew before this weekend that the Ward family was good people. Now I know they’re also good friends. From left to right … Andy, Bill, your humble author, and Matt.

 

[KOWBOY]

I did finally get a hall pass from Mr. Ward on Sunday mornin’ tho to check out the other vendors. Lots of nice stuff and cool displays. I ain’t about to review all that since that’ll be all over the web. But I did take two pics. That’s right … not one … but TWO Super Duty’s with friggin’ snorkels. These make me laugh.

Spent a nice evenin’ with Tim and his buddies next door. Done more socializin’ this weekend than the last ten years combined I bet. Good times.

 

[KOWBOY]

So this mornin’ it was up and at ‘em. Said my good-byes and eased on up the road. Back-tracked up to Moab on a very windy day. But I think it’s the first tailwind I’ve ever had in this rig. Just good livin’. Cool to see all the other rigs out on the road as well. And more beautiful scenery. A very pleasant and uneventful trip. Once in Moab, it was the laundry, diesel, beer thang and then back up the Colorado River on 128 to the old Dewey Bridge. I promised Johnny Law I’d make it out to the Dolores River Overlook. And I’m gonna. But it ain’t gonna be today. Done drove enuf and y’all know at this point I’m needin’ a beer. So found me a rare grassy spot for these parts and settled in. You can see one of the Old Dewey Bridge towers in the background.

 

[KOWBOY]

Tuesday, May 20

And I still ain’t made it to that damned overlook.

Nice early sunrise and a big breakfast. It’s lil’ over 17 miles to the overlook up the dirt road I’m camped beside. Here we go. Easin’ along on the 2wd road and enjoyin’ the beautiful ridge of rock that the road follows around. And I just love the trees here. Seems like half the tree is dead and the other half struggles along. I stopped quite a few times and snapped a whole bunch of pics of various trees with the rock wall in the background. Here’s the best of the batch in my opinion. I’m especially fond of the last one.

And here’s just a pretty lil’ creek crossin’ with a nice cottonwood tree. The cottonwoods that grow along these lil’ cricks are so intense green that they sure offer a stark contrast to the immediate surroundin’s.

 

[KOWBOY]

By definition of goin’ to an overlook, it really ain’t surprisin’ much that the road gener’ly goes uphill. It was pretty much right steady uphill passed that crick crossin’. I got ‘bout 12 miles in and noticed that my Banks pod gauge on the pillar was showin’ that my transmission temp was goin’ up. That gauge ain’t never gone up much. But it kept goin’. Almost into the yellow area of the gauge I stopped on a reasonably flat spot and shut ‘er down. Looked underneath and seen some drippin’ into a small puddle. Popped the hood and pulled the dipstick. Nothin’. I got nothin’. Fawk. And I got no extra transmission juice with me.

Only thang I could think to do at the moment was to drink a beer. So I did. Beer makes me think clearly and use sound logic. Continuin’ up that hill … and away from civilization … seemed like a damned poor choice at the time. So I fired ‘er back up and turned around. Put the tranny in neutral and coasted down a few miles. Temp went right back on down to normal. I stopped at a nice big flat rock and crawled under ‘er for a look-see. Just a drop or two but can’t tell the or’gin. Banks temp gauge still good. So off I go. At one point on the way out there’s a section of ‘bout 2 miles that’s uphill. Right eye on the road … left eye on the gauge. All good. Keep goin’. Got back to pavement and still all good on the temp gauge so headed the 30 miles into Moab. No issues. Gauge good. Shiftin’ good. Got to town and hit the NAPA for two quarts of juice and a skinny-ass funnel. Checked the owner’s manual for the right type juice and the very nice man at the counter verified it on his computer as well. So I dumped in ‘bout a quarter of the quart and checked the dipstick. All good. Looked underneath and had lost a few drops on the parkin’ lot while I was there. So back up the road to Dewey. No issues. Normally ya might say that drivin’ 60 miles roundtrip to town would suck. But not when it’s highway 128 along the Colorado River. Just a beautiful drive.

It should be noted at some point here that the fac’try transmission temperature gauge in the dash never moved off it’s normal half-way point durin’ this entire episode.

Didn’t wanna push my luck on the overlook trail again today … especially on the day before my flight back to work. So set up camp along the river near the old Dewey Bridge ‘bout a hun’erd yards from where I was last night. ‘Cept it’s only midday and it’s hot and windy. Need shade. So in between gusts, I run out the new awnin’ and staked ‘er out hard. She did real good in the stiff wind and I drank beer in the shade. Right into the afternoon and right on into the evenin’.

At one point I did pop the hood and check the transmission dipstick. Right at normal for a cold readin’ accordin’ to the owner’s manual. And no drips underneath. I ain’t no mechanic but I sure ain’t gotta clue what to make of this deal. Gonna have to monitor it closely for sure. This campin’ spot beats the hell outta stayin’ behind the gravel pile at Exit #214 like last time. And I’m prob’ly only half hour or so away from it so should have an easy shot to the airport tomorrow.

 

[KOWBOY]

Wednesday, 21 May

In fact it was only 20 miles up to I-70. Then on into Fruita to the Colorado Welcome Center rest area, which has an RV dump station. And a truck stop next door. So s***ter’s empty and water and diesel are full. No transmission issues and no more drips. Strange deal.

So the end of the latest adventure. It was weird havin’ to be places at a certain time with the weddin’ and the Expo. But a great time. Weather last coupla days been unseasonably hot and very windy. Hope it gets back to normal for my next go ‘round or I’m headin’ into the mountains instead of Moab. We’ll see.

At the airport now. Off to Miami and the real world.

 

[KOWBOY]

END OF CHAPTER 5

 

[KOWBOY]

CHAPTER 6


Thursday, 05 June 2014

A final thank you to Johnny Law of the Moab PD for givin’ me some local spots to check out awhile back. Because of his excellent advice, I’m sittin’ here at the Dolores River Overlook next to a roarin’ fire, drinkin’ a 12 pack of Coors, and eatin’ a bucket of fried chicken. Pretty decent fried chicken at that.

 

[KOWBOY]

Gettin’ up at 0330 in the mornin’ sucks. You’d think that since I get up ev’ry mornin’ at 0430 to go to work that an hour earlier wouldn’t be no big deal. It is. And it sucks. Nevertheless, that’s what time I got up this mornin’ in a hotel in Charlotte, NC. Drove up from Miami a few days ago to attend two, mind-numbin’ 10-hour long meetin’s yesterday and the day before. Grand Junction ain’t much of an airport and by the time the meetin’ was over yesterday there weren’t no flight to get me there. So I booked the first one out this mornin’. And was headin’ to the remote parkin’ lot at 0400. To catch a 6 o’clock bird to Houston and then another one on into Grand Junction from there. Supposed to have landed at 1045 local time but was an hour late. Still not bad tho since I was in my junk by noonday. After a quick stop for chicken and beer at the Safeway, I was down the road to the Old Dewey Bridge. Pretty warm … low 90’s.

As soon as ya get off Highway 128 at the Dewey Bridge, they got a real nice pit toilet there. So I left a sizeable donation in there, then walked ‘round to stretch the legs some, and then checked the transmission fluid in the truck. Right on the mark. Zero the trip odometer and off I go again. Attempt number three. As you recall, the first attempt was aborted for concerns over lack of fuel. The second attempt for concerns over lack of transmission fluid. I’m now on a mission from Gawd to see this friggin’ overlook. Eased on along enjoyin’ the scenery and got further than I ever had before. Nice view from atop the mesa lookin’ back the way I come.

 

[KOWBOY]

Surprisin’ly, the road started to head down. Was rocky in some places and steep in some as well. Good road tho but the trees did manage to add some pinstripin’.

Road then leveled off for the most part and was smooth sailin’ ‘cross this plateau. You can see the road headin’ on towards the tip of that bluff.

 

[KOWBOY]

And 18 miles in-country, the road ends in a small lil’ turn around. So 16 hours after my alarm went off in Charlotte, NC … I’m settin’ up camp at the Dolores River Overlook in Utah. And no problems with the transmission temperature gauge. Most excellent.

It was really a great road. Like I say, lil’ steep in places and a lil’ rocky in places but I believe a decent driver could make it in a Subaru Brat. With them uber cool back seats with the pistol-grip hand holds. Hell … now that I think about it … the Pimp Daddy Ghetto Cruiser might even be able to make it here.

 

[KOWBOY]

Out the Window.

 

[KOWBOY]

Ain’t gotta clue who the hell Dolores is, but the overlook is for the Dolores River.

Here’s a coupla pics lookin’ to the left.

And a coupla pics lookin’ to the right.

 

[KOWBOY]

And a few pics walkin’ round the camp while drinkin’ beer.

 

[KOWBOY]

I’ve done said before how I’m amazed at these trees that are mostly dead but still got some part of ‘em that’s alive. Check this one out. The branch on the far right is still alive.

Sometimes the struggle for life comes down to nuthin’ more than the will to live. My brother had none. He died at 42. Got the cancer and just give up. Reckon I got a stronger will. Doctor’s done wrote me off after my scooter wreck and were shocked when I woke up. Got that from Momma I reckon. She fought the good fight for over thirty years. Wonder how long that tree’s been fightin’? I respect the hell outta that.

 

[KOWBOY]

Coupla real nice folks in a RZR stopped by a lil’ later and I welcomed them to my yard. They’d been out travelin’ on the highways and byways with their toyhauler for awhile and hailed from Clemson, SC. We compared notes on which trails we’d traveled in the area and had a right nice conversation. The wife was definitely jealous that I got to stay there on the overlook and they had to bounce all the way back down that road to Dewey.

But it ain’t all heaven on Earth here tho. The breeze would come and go. And when it was gone, the gnats came out. Real quick. Damned varmints are just teeth with wings. They weren’t just thick … they were so thick it was Biblical. I’ve seen ‘em bad on the Carolina coast before but nuthin’ like this. Drove me right into the camper.

Which gave me a chance to finish readin’ the book on my Kindle thangy that I’d started readin’ on the plane. Seems some radiation from some radar units in Siberia had somehow brought back to life some Wooly Mammoths and they wandered down into Michigan. One got hit in the head by a passin’ vehicle whilst he was on the side of the road and made him all messed up and irate. So a local redneck had to shoot ‘im down. Very well written book. And I ‘preciate that.

But evenin’ came and the gnats left. Don’t know where they went and don’t much care.

 

[KOWBOY]

So on the final day of the Overland Expo last month, folks was bailin’ out like rats ‘cause of the nasty winds. The vendor right across from us was the Overland Journal magazine. When they high-tailed it, they left a box next to a tree in their area that had ‘Expo Hoodies’ written on the side. I sure didn’t want them leavin’ that, so I checked it out. It weren’t hoodies at all. It was firewood. Perfect. So I chunked the box in the camper in Arizona and hauled it to Colorado and then to here in Utah.

Reckon the previous tenants of my campin’ spot on the overlook didn’t have no chairs ‘cause they had three great big blocks of wood sittin’ ‘round the fire ring to sit on. Well I got me a helluva nice chair I bought at the Expo from the Oz tent folks … and I gotta Stihl splittin’ maul in the truck. So I made quick work of them blocks.

Whoever built this fire ring musta been a stone mason. Highest quality and most attractive fire ring I’ve ever done seen.

When I went campin’ as a young’un, Daddy would say that the Indians built small fires and the white man built big fires. Meanwhile, Momma was constantly throwin’ wood on the fire. She didn’t build Indian fires or even white-man fires … nosir. She built what she called airplane fires. She claimed if’n ya can’t see it from an airplane then it ain’t no good. I had me an airplane fire. Hope she seen it.

So I sat there and drank beer and ate fried chicken ‘till the wood was all gone. Not a sound to be heard and a kerbillion stars overhead. Quite a change of scenery from this morning at 0330 in a hotel room in Charlotte, NC.