Traumatic Brain Injury Talk (1 Viewer)

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pngunme said:
The guys who showed compassion, had the capacity for it...
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I'm talking about their initial thoughts on what just happened. Some see that I'm ignoring people, some see that I'm overwhelmed.
 
Big Ed said:
I'm talking about their initial thoughts on what just happened. Some see that I'm ignoring people, some see that I'm overwhelmed.
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Ed,

This is what I meant about "not having the capacity" --> Some see that I'm ignoring people,

... What I meant about "having the capacity" --> Some see that I'm overwhelmed.

But, please realize... I wasn't there... And I'm getting in over my head here... Maybe I'm not entirely understanding...
 
@Big Ed - Man it is tuff out there - in the civilan world. When we were in the service, we had order, discipline, and routine. We took care of each other, pushed each other (to be better, and tweaked each others buttons), and we were ALWAYS there for one another. Civilians just do not understand our camaraderie.

I didnt serve in any combat envirment - I was on a submarine, so even if I did, I could'nt tell you or..... We Bubbleheads, as all volunteered to serve on subs, and agreed to qualify ships. We all chose to learn all of the intricacies of all of the systems, to know how to save each and everyone of our brothers, in the event they needed us.

I am here to tell you - I am qualified, and always will be - to help every shipmate, soldier, airman and marine, whenever, wherever, and however i can. Today, I am here tohear your story, and to remind all those around me - that what ever struggle each of us faces, some else is facing their own struggle, and that we know nothing about that struggle.

We are here fo you.
 
Thanks for replying. As you say, I don't need to understand the other guys struggle. If he says it is, then it is. And there's nothing like the camaraderie in the armed forces, we were almost as one. I remember a time they came into the barracks saying the commanders convoy was under attack, and all the gun trucks were going out as soon as possible (I was a gunner). It usually took me a few trips to get my weapons and all my gear out to my truck, I had a 50 cal, and a M16. The truck was brought up, I grabbed what I could, others grabbed the rest, the truck was loaded and pulled around to the command post in just a few minutes. It's an awesome feeling. Turns out a patrol helped the commanders convoy, and we didn't go out. But we were ready as instructed.
 
Well said guys!!

I was never in a combat environment either...

Just simulated combat, under NATO. But, the camaraderie we (all branches of our military, as well as various branches of the military of our NATO allies) was legendary!!

I Also served with all branches of our military, as well as our Canadian brethren at Cheyenne Mountain (NORAD), the camaraderie at NORAD and in the Special Activities Squadrons was also legendary!!

When I retired, after 20 years, and went to work for the State of Texas, it was VERY difficult to become accustomed with a bunch of undisciplined people who didn't know the meaning of camaraderie and really didn't worry about dropping their workload on others, simply because they were too lazy to get out of bed.

Over the 23 years of my second career, I worked for Texas, IRS, a School District, a couple of San Francisco-based companies (from my home in Texas) and The Home Depot Austin Technology Center.

I never became fully accustomed to the lack of discipline I encountered in the civilian workforce, but I always made sure I left my jobs more organized and documented than I found them.

...and I always encountered a percentage of the civilian workforce that acted exactly like those that you encountered in your club, Ed.

This civilian workforce experience and the two relatives/friends that have a TBI are where my insights come from... I certainly don't know it all, but I do know that there are people who simply won't tolerate people they don't understand or to whom they simply can't relate... They will never invest the time or effort to develop any sort of empathy...
 
I've had a club member friend come over the last two days helping me with my truck, both doors are clearanced, hung and adjusted. It's good to have people that are understanding. I told him this has stressed the hell out of me, he said "I know, I can see it". At the same time there are people that are way out in left field, what a contrast!

I'm going with an out of state club for a trail run Sunday through Saturday, they wanted someone familiar with the trail. I've been communicating with their group leader since about March, I've helped with many banks of questions. I told him in the beginning what conditions I have, and why, and what difficulties come with it. I said I wouldn't take my truck with an unfamiliar group because if something went wrong it would be extremely stressful for me, and I wouldn't be able to speak. But I would ride, he responded with "I'd be honored to have you ride with me". So maybe it's time to start creating some good memories to push out the recent bad memories.
 
Thanks Danny, they are really excited to run the trail for the first time. I'm looking forward to getting up there for the first time this season too, sounds like I'll be with good people.
 
What I sent the trip leader, and his response.

I would like them to know if I don't respond to them at some point in the trip, don't think I'm mad. I will respond when I can. My friend Randy called a little bit ago, we've got a lot of trail trips together. Including about six times through Dusy. He thought my going with your club was a good fit for me because of how well I know the trail. Randy is the one that helped me with my truck many times when I couldn't handle interacting with more than one person. He asked if you were aware of my difficulties, I told him about our conversation on that back in the beginning. He thought I should reiterate that with the whole group. I don't foresee problems, but an ounce of prevention could go a long way.

Ed, This group has been looking forward to this trip for some time. While we were planning the Rubicon run back in 2011 we were already talking about making the Dusy Ershim our next big event. Everybody is pumped up, ready to go and anxious to contribute in any way they can to assure a positive experience. One of the things everyone is excited about is your willingness to share with them your love and knowledge of this trail. What everyone will be focused on during the entire 5 days is the beautiful scenery and setting up for that next obstacle ahead! See you in 3 days!

This was sent two days ago, I join them in the morning.
 
Outstanding Ed!!!

These sound like the kind of guys to spend your time with... Rather than wasting your time with the unappreciative lot in your last club.

Being proactive can always smooth the way... I'm glad you set realistic expectations for them... So, they know a little about you and therefore have a better understanding.

Have a great time and give them the safe adventure for which they are looking!!
 
I agree Danny, they sound like good people. I'm looking forward to it. I will be absent from the veterans Highway for about a week, then I'll give a report.
 
pngunme said:
Then, hopefully, the next session will give you a chance to open up...
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I was able to talk to the group counselor for a few minutes at the ceremony the other day, I explained I would miss the next group because I would be in the mountains, but would be at the following one.
 
I had a trip leader from the Mesa Arizona 4WD Club contact me in February asking me to go along in my rig and show them the Dusy Ershim trail. They would pay fuel, and provide food. None of them had been before, and they wanted someone to show them the way. I explained that since getting back from Iraq I have difficulty focusing, especially under stress. And that taking my rig with an unfamiliar group would be too much, but I would ride if a seat was available. This was when I thought my truck would be ready in time, he said he would be honored to have me ride with him. They had five Dusy planning meetings, and I helped with several banks of questions. I was picked up Sunday the 13th, and we went to breakfast with John Skadden and his daughter Susan. John is the last living member that built the trail, both John and the visitors had big smiles after the breakfast.

This is just before we started into the trail (with 16 rigs) on the 14th, from Voyager Rock Campground. Smokey from the Rough Fire.


It started raining as we were leaving, and this is what it looked like on top of Chicken Rock.


This is a right turn that is well known.




The guys were in good spirits, and having a good time.


We passed the last campsite before Thompson Hill at 2:30 (the one with the log table and bench) and I thought that was early enough to continue on. The leader kept stopping at little obstacles and spotting every rig through, costing us time. We got to the bottom of Thompson about five, the rig I was in kept having air come out of the drivers side rear tire when up against a rock. We put on the spare, while doing this the group started passing us. Next thing I know it's dark and foggy (poor visibility), I walked up the hill and got in what was now the lead rig, to show the way into camp. We had all Jeeps, except for one Land Rover, and a Toyota pickup. We started hearing the Rover had a bent rear control arm, causing the axle to be forward on one side, and back on the other. Also heard the CJ5 had a broken front axle, those two and two helper rigs stayed the night on the hill. The rest of the group camped at the big area closer to the hill.

It rained pretty good that night, and the next morning Thompson Hill was muddy and had standing water. I was up and down the hill carrying messages probably ten times before it was over. Seven of the rigs, including all four of the women decided to continue to Ershim Lake because of the rain (it was still raining).

They removed the control arm, put it in a space between two boulders, and winched it pretty straight. Then stuck it into an angle iron and welded it, using three batteries. Put it back on, and put on a complete spare rear driveshaft (the u joint had torn right out of the ears). After a while the CJ5 and Rover were ready to move, then we hear the rover has a broken rear driveshaft again, and is being winched up. I go down and look, and there are two Jeeps behind them. After a while I'm back on top and the two Jeeps come up saying the Rover has a broken Burfield and a dead battery, and they were using a power pack to start it. That wasn't the first time that happened, too much winching was killing the battery. They replace the Burfield and decide to leave the Rover, but not any people. They rode with others and continued with the group. Extreme Off Road And Repair in Covis was called and given the heads up to come retrieve the Rover, the owner had a satellite phone.



This is the table at East Lake, someone felled a tree just beyond it.




Rover owner talking to Extreme Off Road at Ershim Lake, the storm cleared out all the smoke.


Dumping in gas at Ershim Lake.


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