Texican
s-Moderator
Here are a few
> > neat military comebacks...
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > When in England
> > at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop
> > of
> > Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an
> >
> > example of empire
> > building by George Bush.
> >
> > He answered by
> > saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine
> > young
> > men
> > and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders
> > The
> > only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to
> > bury
> > those that did not return.
> >
> > It became very
> > quiet in the room.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > Then there was a
> > conference in France where a number of international engineers were
> > taking part, including French and American. During a break one of the
> > French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have you heard the
> > latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to
> > Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do,
> > bomb
> > them?'
> >
> > A Boeing engineer
> > stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on
> > board
> > that
> > can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can
> > supply
> > emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three
> > cafeterias
> > with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can
> > produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each
> > day,
> > and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting
> > victims
> > and injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such
> > ships; how many does France have?'
> >
> > Once again, dead
> > silence.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > A U.S. Navy
> > Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from
> > the
> > U.S., English, Canadian, Australian and French
> >
> > navies. At a cocktail
> > reception, he found himself standing with a large group of officers
> > that included personnel from most of those countries.
> >
> > Everyone was chatting
> > away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral
> > suddenly
> > complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans
> > learn
> > only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak
> > English in these conferences rather than speaking French?'
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Without
> > hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the
> > Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to
> > speak German.'
> >
> > You could have
> > heard a pin drop
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > AND THIS STORY
> > FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE
> >
> > A g
> > roup of
> > Americans, retired teachers, recently went to France on a tour.
> > Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by
> >
> > plane.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > At French
> > Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on.
> > "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer
> > asked sarcastically.
> >
> > Mr. Whiting
> > admitted that he had been to France previously. "Then you
> > should know enough to have your passport ready." The
> > American said,
> >
> > "The last time I
> > was here, I didn't have to show it"
> >
> >
> > "Impossible. Americans always
> > have to show your passports on arrival in France!"
> >
> >
> > The American senior gave the Frenchman
> > a long hard look. Then he quietly explained. "Well, when I came ashore
> > at
> > Omaha Beach on D-Day in '44 to help liberate this country,
> > couldn't find any damn Frenchmen to show it to"
> >
> > neat military comebacks...
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > When in England
> > at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop
> > of
> > Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an
> >
> > example of empire
> > building by George Bush.
> >
> > He answered by
> > saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine
> > young
> > men
> > and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders
> > The
> > only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to
> > bury
> > those that did not return.
> >
> > It became very
> > quiet in the room.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > Then there was a
> > conference in France where a number of international engineers were
> > taking part, including French and American. During a break one of the
> > French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have you heard the
> > latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to
> > Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do,
> > bomb
> > them?'
> >
> > A Boeing engineer
> > stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on
> > board
> > that
> > can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can
> > supply
> > emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three
> > cafeterias
> > with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can
> > produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each
> > day,
> > and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting
> > victims
> > and injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such
> > ships; how many does France have?'
> >
> > Once again, dead
> > silence.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > A U.S. Navy
> > Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from
> > the
> > U.S., English, Canadian, Australian and French
> >
> > navies. At a cocktail
> > reception, he found himself standing with a large group of officers
> > that included personnel from most of those countries.
> >
> > Everyone was chatting
> > away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral
> > suddenly
> > complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans
> > learn
> > only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak
> > English in these conferences rather than speaking French?'
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > Without
> > hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the
> > Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to
> > speak German.'
> >
> > You could have
> > heard a pin drop
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> > AND THIS STORY
> > FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE
> >
> > A g
> > roup of
> > Americans, retired teachers, recently went to France on a tour.
> > Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by
> >
> > plane.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > At French
> > Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on.
> > "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer
> > asked sarcastically.
> >
> > Mr. Whiting
> > admitted that he had been to France previously. "Then you
> > should know enough to have your passport ready." The
> > American said,
> >
> > "The last time I
> > was here, I didn't have to show it"
> >
> >
> > "Impossible. Americans always
> > have to show your passports on arrival in France!"
> >
> >
> > The American senior gave the Frenchman
> > a long hard look. Then he quietly explained. "Well, when I came ashore
> > at
> > Omaha Beach on D-Day in '44 to help liberate this country,
> > couldn't find any damn Frenchmen to show it to"
> >
