FOR SALE - 1973 FJ55 LANDCRUISER $25000
This isnt your normal landcruiser. This is the landcruiser the devil himself would drive if he wasnt busy doing devil stuff like like making tsunamis and things.
It's setup to go bushbashing and bashing the bush is what it does.
Who doesn't like to go bushbashing? Dirty tree hugging conservationist hippies. thats who.
Are you a dirtyy hippie? no? then you need this car.
God may have created the world in 6 days, but on the seventh, when he was resting, the devil himself popped up and created the enviroment destroying, ozone depleting, ice cap melting, kill the poor, poison the water table, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, turn the entire 3rd world into a huge uninhabitable desert, iron pig FJ55 Landcruiser.
Why "Iron Pig"?
"Picture a long, wide mud pit... you know what I'm talking about. The kind of pit filled with stinky, brown, chunky mud the consistency of a thick stew...
the smell of rotting vegetation is in the air, horseflies and dragonflies buzz overhead, and an old swaybacked cow chews its cud contentedly at the edge of the water, swinging its tail slowly as the morning dew dissipates and the sun dries a thin layer of the mud, deceiving you, beckoning...
"In the middle of this long, wide mud pit, wallowing contentedly, is a rare beast.
Its weight draws it deeper into the mud, but somehow it is still moving, slowly, ever so slowly... its form hints at its strength, yet it moves with a certain grace that seems impossible for its bulk... nothing about this beast is delicate, and yet it possesses a strange beauty, a sense of timeless appeal.... you feel slightly repulsed, yet strangely attracted... you can sense its feral nature, its danger, but you can tell that this beast is somehow noble, a true master of its environment...
"Is it a wild boar, or a Cape buffalo? Perhaps a scarred old African bull elephant?...
No, the noble beast that has captivated your attention and perhaps your heart is a Toyota Land Cruiser FJ55, and now you know why those who of us in the know, those of an enlightened nature, those of us who believe, call it an "Iron Pig".
It is a sign of respect, of admiration, a fitting tribute...
This iron pig stands out from the rest with its 308 V8 and 650 holley giving that manly tim the tool man V8 grunt and sound. URGH URGH URGH!!
and a roobar big enough to take out a small village!
This iron pig is a tank, and it drives like one, destroying anything in its path.
Forget about pulling hot chicks with this piggy, this pig scares women and children.
ask my mother and kids.
Heating in winter is achieved by wearing warmer clothes and cooling in summer is achieved with an esky and ice cold beer.
This iron pig is too manly for most "men" and your friends will be scared to follow you out bush. they wont make it. Just looking at it will scare your drinking buddies and you will be the talk of the campfire.
If this piggy still doesnt sound manly enough for you, its fitted with a long range fuel tank that will take most of your hard earned pay cheque to fill it, leaving you just enough money to fill the esky with beer.
If you think your manly enough to own this noble beast,
dial 1800- eat sh.t and see if u get a reply.
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got pics?
