With shorts, they draw a lot of amps. As you are aware. The contacts in a relay can get welded. Even though you hear a click doesn't mean the solenoid (relay) is working. It just means the actuator is moving.
Put a mulitimeter set to ohms across the relay main wire (big wire) posts. You have to disconnect the wiring to do this otherwise you get system loops etc. With no power you should have no continuity. If you see continuity, it's welded. Keep in mind some relays are opposite, being normally closed. Not for a glow relay though.
If you cannot figure it out, one step will be to replace the glow plugs with 10.5 ones. Then add a relay and wire your switch for a purely manual set up. Cutting out the controller thing, and all the wires.
Put a mulitimeter set to ohms across the relay main wire (big wire) posts. You have to disconnect the wiring to do this otherwise you get system loops etc. With no power you should have no continuity. If you see continuity, it's welded. Keep in mind some relays are opposite, being normally closed. Not for a glow relay though.
If you cannot figure it out, one step will be to replace the glow plugs with 10.5 ones. Then add a relay and wire your switch for a purely manual set up. Cutting out the controller thing, and all the wires.