Monday Chuckle

[nuclearlemon]

having once used a pringles can to shim my steering so i could make the two hour drive home from a 23 hour trip wheeling a 4 hour trail, i can really appreciate that someone else enjoys pringles also.

[66fj40x2]

Dang it Ige.... Now I gotta use a Coors can instead on the Pringes can I was planning to use for the snorkel on 40




That second one's just too funny

[nuclearlemon]

Originally Posted by 66fj40x2

Dang it Ige.... Now I gotta use a Coors can instead on the Pringes can I was planning to use for the snorkel on 40

but pringles rock...wish i'd gotten a pic, but this was the only one. at 3am we weren't thinking to straight

not a coors can, but we used a couple of coke cans to build an air cleaner spacer when a dudes carb caught fire and melted his plastic one...does that count

somewhere i had pics of gary and me cracking eggs into his radiator at snt too, but not sure where those went. fortunately, there aren't any pictures of me dumping six litres of mtn dew and dr pepper in the radiator of my old dodge when we were towing the 45s home.

your food and beverages are not safe when you wheel with me

[Texican]

Tech?????

In the White Trash Forum??????

Where TF is Kowboy.

[66fj40x2]

Originally Posted by Texican

Tech?????

In the White Trash Forum??????

Where TF is Kowboy.

But it's White Trash Tech........

[nuclearlemon]

Originally Posted by Texican

Tech?????

In the White Trash Forum??????

Where TF is Kowboy.

ya know, butch, if you really want tech, i am an 80 owner now so, to keep from offending the folks in 80 tech, i could start a four page thread on the affects of high fructose corn syrup on a cooling system.

[Green Lantern]

Don't know nothin' 'bout corn syrup....
But, I've had to pee in the radiator and my uncle says he used to add corn squeezins to dewater his gas tank.

Does that count?

;-)
Happy Trails! N

Originally Posted by nuclearlemon

ya know, butch, if you really want tech, i am an 80 owner now so, to keep from offending the folks in 80 tech, i could start a four page thread on the affects of high fructose corn syrup on a cooling system.

[KOWBOY]

A drunk walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar, and orders a drink. Looking around, he sees three tough-looking bikers sitting at a corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table, looks the biggest, meanest biker in the face, and says, "I went by your grandma's house today and I saw her in the hallway buck-naked. Man, she is one fine looking woman!"
The biker looks at him and doesn't say a word. His buddies are confused, because he is one bad biker and always gets into fights at the drop of a hat.
The drunk leans on the table again and says, "I got it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I ever had!"
The biker's buddies are starting to get upset, but the biker still says nothing.
The drunk leans over one more time and says, "I'll tell you something else, boy, your grandma liked it!" At this point, the biker stands up, takes the drunk by the shoulders, looks him square in the eyes and says, "Grandpa, go home, you're drunk!"

[KOWBOY]

What's the difference between a wife, a nymphomaniac, and a hooker?
The nympho says, "You're done already?"
The hooker says, "Are you done yet?"
And the wife says, "Beige, I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."

[KOWBOY]

A drunk says to the bartender, "I want a woman!" So, the bartender gives him directions to the local brothel. The customer was so drunk, he misreads the directions and accidentally goes into the office of a foot doctor. The receptionist at the counter asks, "Can I help you?" "Yes, I want some service," states the drunk. She sends him to one of the examination rooms and tells him to put it on the table. The drunk goes in and places his manhood on the exam table. When the doctor comes in, the startled podiatrist sees the man's member on the table and she says, "That's not a foot!" The drunk replies, "Give it time, lady, give it time."

[66fj40x2]

[KOWBOY]

Billy Bob and Lester were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob told Lester, "You know, I reckon I'm about ready for a vacation. Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different.
The last few years, I took your suggestions as to where to go.
Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Marie got pregnant.
Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Marie got pregnant again.
Last year, you suggested Tahiti and darned if Marie didn't get pregnant again."
Lester asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that's different?"
Billy Bob says, "This year, I'm taking Marie with me."

[FJ60Cam]

A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. The guy knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in 'fashion sense.' He walks up to him and says, 'I didn't know you were into earrings.'

'Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring,' he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to ask, 'So, how long have you been wearing one?'
'Ever since my wife found it in my truck.'

--------------------------------------------------------------

Because he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly, widower father died, Charles decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with.

Going to a singles' bar, he spotted a woman whose beauty took his breath away. "I'm just an ordinary man," he said walking up to her, "but in a little while, my father will die and I'll inherit 20 million dollars. I would like to have someone to share it with. Will you come home with me?" The woman went home with Charles, and the next day she became his stepmother.

[Green Lantern]

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its f ace, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.
Probably wasn't the same elephant.

[66fj40x2]

White Trash smoke detect'r.....

[nuclearlemon]

here's a non techy post

this years hot halloween costume...retired hooters girl

[nuclearlemon]

my take on the bailout

[FJ60Cam]

A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist's office.
The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?"
The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"
The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.
When the couple finishes, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.
The next week, however, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?"
The old man says, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare...!

[Texican]

Quote for the day:

"Whatever you give a woman, she's going to multiply.

If you give her a sperm, she will give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she will give you a home.

If you give her groceries, she will give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she will give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her."

So remember - if you give her a small amount of crap, you will receive a ton of shit.

[Texican]

"What are your worst fears?"



Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S.
2. Child/spouse dying/terminal illness.
3. Terminal illness/self.

Ebony/Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail

[DavidW]

THink you left something out there.

[valkyrie610]

Originally Posted by Texican

Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S.
2. Child/spouse dying/terminal illness.
3. Terminal illness/self.

Ebony/Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail

<jeopardy theme> And the question is... ? </jeopardy theme>

Alex, I would say the question is, "What are your worst fears?"

Did I win?

[Texican]

Originally Posted by valkyrie610

<jeopardy theme> and the question is... ? </jeopardy theme>

alex, i would say the question is, "what are your worst fears?"

did i win?

duh....fixed it
next question please?

[valkyrie610]

And the answer is:

Bacon


<clock begins ticking>

[Texican]

> Saturday morning I got up early, dressed quietly, made my
> lunch,
> grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to hook
> the boat up
> to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential
> down pour.
>
> The wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage,
> turned on
> the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad
> throughout the
> day.
>
> I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped
> back into
> bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a
> different
> anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is
> terrible.'
>
> My loving wife of 20 yrs replied, 'Can you believe my
> stupid husband
> is out fishing in that crap?'
>
> I still don't know to this day if she was joking, but I
> have stopped
> fishing.