The O'ficial Bylaws

[KOWBOY]

Article I: Name

The name of this here club, By Gawd, shall always be “The White Trash of the Elwood Chapter”.

Article II: Reason

The reasons we done organized this here club are:

1. To fully support the Toyota Land Cruiser Association, Inc.

2. To fully support the consumption of beer.

3. To gather up as often as we can and just have fun.

This here club shall operate without profit, shall be nonpartisan and nonsectarian.

Article III: Membership

Section 1: Votin’ members

The only votin’ members of this here club are the five (5) human officers. [The canine officer ain’t allowed to do no votin’.]

Section 2: Elite members

There are two Elite Members:

Woody ............. Computer Genius
Butch Baker ...... Grumpy Technical Advisor

They done got free lifetime memberships for actin’ above and beyond the call of duty in helpin’ our club. They don’t get no vote though.

Section 3: The Club's Bitch

Nolen Grogan

He don’t get no vote … and he’s gotta pay dues ... but every club needs a Bitch … and we’re proud to have one.

Section 4: General Members

All general members are expected to mindlessly accept the decisions of the officers without questionin’, commentin’, or complainin’.

Persons seekin’ membership in this here club, as general members, must meet the followin’ requirements:

1. Gotta attend a minimum of three (3) O’ficial Club Runs before application can be made.

2. Gotta be voted in by a minimum of two (2) of the five (5) human officers. The worthiness of a prospective member will be determined on an individual basis and all decisions are final.

3. Gotta own a 4WD Toyota vehicle … or somethin’ that once was a 4WD Toyota vehicle … or somethin’ that sorta resembles a 4WD Toyota vehicle … or a non-Toyota 4WD vehicle approved by a minimum of two (2) of the five (5) human officers … although it don’t need to be actually operational at any given time.

4. If’n you do own a Toyota 4WD vehicle … you gotta be a member, and remain a member, of TLCA.

5. Course … if’n the officers take a vote … all the above can be overlooked at our convenience.

All general members are expected to clearly display at least one of our club stickers on their trail vehicle at all times.

General members will receive a club sticker and a membership card annually ... or at least we’ll try.

General members can be kicked out of this here club at any time by a vote of four (4) of the five (5) human officers. There ain’t no appeal process. Plus the sumbitch has gotta return any evidence of club membership and live the rest of his/her miserable life in shame.

Section 5: Charter members

For historians that discover this here document in the distant future, let it be known that, for better or for worse, the concept of this here club originated from the not-so-sober-at-the-time minds of Kowboy and Josh Baker.

Section 6: Dues

There shall be no dues for the six (6) officers or the two (2) Elite Members.

The annual dues to be paid by each of the general members will be determined by the officers for any given year and announced to the membership prior to the year which they will be paid. Once the dues have been established for a given year, they can’t be changed ‘till the next year.

All dues will be paid within 30 days of bein’ granted a membership and will be good through the end of that calendar year in which the membership was granted.

Dues for ensuin’ years will be paid by the end of January in order to remain a member in good standin’.

Any member that gets kicked out of this here club will not be refunded any portion of their dues.

Section 7: Sale of Vehicle

Upon sale of a vehicle, the member must remove all club decals and emblems from their vehicle.

Article IV: Meetin’s

Attendance at meetin’s is encouraged, but not required.

Meetin’s shall be conducted nightly when the President is in Elwood. These meetin’s shall be held at the O’ficial Club Headquarters, The 3X’s Ranch and Retirement Home, … unless we meet somewheres else.

Meetin’s shall also be conducted nightly when the club is at an O’ficial club run, as determined by the President. These meetin’s will be held within the confines of our O’ficial encampment, “The White Trash Commune” ... unless we meet somewheres else. “The White Trash Commune” shall be plainly marked with numerous pink flamingos and our O’ficial Club Banner durin’ the entire time period of the club run.

Solicitin’ prostitutes durin’ an O’ficial meetin’ is expressly forbidden.

No votes shall be taken at a meetin’ if any one officer has consumed more than eighteen (18) beers since the meetin’ was called to order.

Article V: Votin’

Unless stated otherwise, all votes pertainin’ to the activities of this here club require four (4) of the five (5) human officers to agree on the issue in order for it to be passed.

Article VI: Management

The management of this club is at the sole discretion of the officers.

Article VII: Officers

The officers of this club are permanent positions. Death or resignation is the only way out. Should either of these occur, the remainin’ officers may elect to appoint a replacement, by unanimous vote only, if they feel it’s appropriate to do so.

The officers are as follows:

Kowboy .......................... President/Commander-in-Chief
Josh Baker ...................... Vice President/Mechanic/Welder
Lynn Renfro ..................... Secretary/Treasurer/Spiritual Advisor
David Williams ................. Fire and Rescue Chief
David Dearborn ............... Foreign Minister
Smootus ......................... Chief of Security


Article VIII: Duties of Officers

The titles are self-explanatory.

All officers will work together in order to maintain the operation of this club.

All officers are expected to have modified their trail vehicle with a sawzall.

All officers are expected to paint their trail vehicle olive drab green with a big-ass white club sticker on the hood.

The officers will designate a TLCA Delegate and Alternate Delegate that will attend the regular TLCA meetin’s so we get represented. The delegates shall have the authority to vote on behalf of the club and in the best interest of the club at the TLCA meetin’s. Representation at the TLCA meetin’s is a high priority for this here club.


Article IX: Amendments

Amendments to these bylaws may be made at any time by a vote of the officers and we done did this on the followin’ occasions:

Amendment #1: Done on 01 January 2006

Amendment #2: Done on 16 March 2006

Amendment #3: Done on 18 November 2006