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12-14-05, 08:11 AM
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#1441 |
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IH8MUD Lifer
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it is now clear
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12-14-05, 08:24 AM
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#1442 | ||
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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Quote:
Not only yeah, but HELL YEAH! __________________ Quote:
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12-14-05, 08:25 AM
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#1443 |
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 3,291
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news tidbit
One of the local television stations in South Louisiana actually aired an interview with a woman of color from New Orleans. The interviewer was a woman from a Boston affiliate, so she asked the interviewee how such total and complete devastation of the churches in the area had affected their lives.
The woman replied, "I don't know about all those other peoples, but we gets our chicken from Popeye's." The look on the interviewer's face was priceless. |
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12-14-05, 08:26 AM
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#1444 | |
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 3,291
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12-14-05, 08:43 AM
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#1445 | ||
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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Quote:
Somehow the text needs to be blended with this post: http://forum.ih8mud.com/showpost.php...&postcount=294 TUT is all of the above, and more! __________________ Quote:
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12-14-05, 08:50 AM
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#1446 |
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Former Wheeler
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__________________ War Pig and the nameless 45lv "Don't you know, Stan, it's always between a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich." |
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12-14-05, 09:47 AM
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#1447 | |||
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I m m o d e r a t o r
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: If ya don't know, I ain't tellin'
Posts: 1,126
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Quote:
__________________ 87 FJ60 Quote:
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12-14-05, 10:29 AM
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#1448 | ||
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I m m o d e r a t o r
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: If ya don't know, I ain't tellin'
Posts: 1,126
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Let's all appreciate this for a moment.
 
__________________ 87 FJ60 Quote:
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12-14-05, 10:54 AM
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#1449 | |
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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And the modern version:
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12-14-05, 12:21 PM
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#1450 | |
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On a road to nowhere
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Glendale, AZ
Posts: 688
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Get a razor!!! __________________ It takes two to tango; one to do the running man.
// Support the ho-less: buy my Sexy Nekkid TEQ Lady Cruiser stuff // Copper State Cruisers member #69  |
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12-14-05, 01:36 PM
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#1451 | ||
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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Quote:
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12-14-05, 01:37 PM
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#1452 | ||
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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Quote:
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12-14-05, 01:43 PM
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#1453 |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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One for Swank
CHUCK NORRIS Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement. Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living shit out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did. Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya". Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever. Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away. When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane". Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway. Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the shit out of little kids. Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!" The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided. When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women. One of the greatest cover-ups of the last century was the fact that Hitler did not commit suicide in his bunker, but was in fact tea-bagged to death by Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris doesn't understand why you should consult your doctor if your erection lasts for more than 4 hours. His erections have been known to last for up to 15 days. Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded. Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then drank three kegs and shit on their floor, just because he's Chuck Norris. Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights. Chuck Norris took my virginity, and he will sure as hell take yours. If you're thinking to yourself, "That's impossible, I already lost my virginity.", then you are dead wrong. Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the shit out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill. Chuck Norris found out about Conan O'Brien's lever that shows clips from "Walker: Texas Ranger" and is working on a way to make it show clips of Norris having sex with Conan's wife. Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that that actually is "his" way. Chuck Norris had his own version of Punk'd. Only in his version, he would walk around and roundhouse kick people in the throats. At the end of each week, Chuck Norris murders a dozen white people just to prove he isn't a racist. When Chuck Norris goes swimming, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck. __________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. Custom Convertable. CHOP www.mudrunner.ca www.obsessiveoffroadclub.com |
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12-14-05, 02:03 PM
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#1454 | ||
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I m m o d e r a t o r
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: If ya don't know, I ain't tellin'
Posts: 1,126
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The Ultimate Thread does not sleep. It waits.
__________________ 87 FJ60 Quote:
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12-14-05, 02:24 PM
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#1455 | |
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: One of Four Presidential Flying Saucers
Posts: 1,463
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Screw Patrick Swayze
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12-14-05, 02:27 PM
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#1456 | |||
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Dain Bramaged Member
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Extreme menatl conflict trying to resolve this
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Quote:
__________________ Dan Johnson Quote:
FJ40, A couple of thingamajigs and a deally bob, fully integrated whatzits, dash board Hula girl (pending spousal approval.) And a pair of Pink Panties, now with a doohicky in the front. Rust never sleeps. .- -.. --... -. .-- |
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12-14-05, 02:29 PM
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#1457 | ||
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Dain Bramaged Member
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Lets get some post going, this is coming up at the top of the page for me
Quote:
__________________ Dan Johnson Quote:
FJ40, A couple of thingamajigs and a deally bob, fully integrated whatzits, dash board Hula girl (pending spousal approval.) And a pair of Pink Panties, now with a doohicky in the front. Rust never sleeps. .- -.. --... -. .-- |
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12-14-05, 02:33 PM
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#1458 |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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HILARY SWANK
__________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. Custom Convertable. CHOP www.mudrunner.ca www.obsessiveoffroadclub.com |
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12-14-05, 02:49 PM
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#1459 |
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grown up MOD
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wrong wrong wrong.......
with junk here still boycotting this thread fuckit... __________________ "If it wasn't a Landcruiser and hadn't been built the way it was you do realize you would be DEAD." VA State Police Officer |
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12-14-05, 02:50 PM
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#1460 |
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IH8MUD Lifer
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 3,291
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nipps
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12-14-05, 02:53 PM
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#1461 |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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Fixed. they were covered nips, Not my fault she was wearing see threw.
 TUT is 
__________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. Custom Convertable. CHOP www.mudrunner.ca www.obsessiveoffroadclub.com Last edited by 4Hummer; 12-14-05 at 03:04 PM. |
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12-14-05, 03:03 PM
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#1462 |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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__________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. Custom Convertable. CHOP www.mudrunner.ca www.obsessiveoffroadclub.com |
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12-14-05, 03:06 PM
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#1463 | ||
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I m m o d e r a t o r
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: If ya don't know, I ain't tellin'
Posts: 1,126
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When are we gonna get to page 50???????
__________________ 87 FJ60 Quote:
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12-14-05, 03:08 PM
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#1464 | |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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Quote:
__________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. Custom Convertable. CHOP www.mudrunner.ca www.obsessiveoffroadclub.com |
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12-14-05, 03:08 PM
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#1465 | |
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IH8MUD Rookie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 36
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Quote:
Or How about now? 
__________________ Michael 91 Toyota 4Runner 22RE. |
Junk
:hillbilly
Gumby
maybe your life took a vacation without you and that's why you are going crazy........