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07-10-05, 09:04 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| | 250+ Club
Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Red Triangle
Posts: 693
| Redneck Marine
Redneck Marine
Dear Ma & Pa:
Am well. Hope you are. Tell brother Walt & Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile.
Tell them to join up quick before maybe all of the places are filled. I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m., but am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt & Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.
Men got to shave but it is not so bad, they git warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food. But tell Walt & Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.
We go on "route" marches, which the Platoon Sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys gets sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.
The country is nice, but awful flat. The Sergeant is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The Capt. is like the school board. Majors & Colonels just ride around & frown. They don't bother you none.
This next will kill Walt & Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk and don't move. And it ain't shooting at you, like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.
Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though - they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake. I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds, and he's 6'8" and weighs near 300 pounds dry.
Be sure to tell Walt & Elmer to hurry & join before other fellers get into this setup & come stampeding in.
Your loving daughter, Gail
P.S. Speaking of shooting, enclosed is $200 towards a new barn roof & Ma's new teeth. The city boys ain't very good at shootin' craps either...
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Speargun Power!
Bene legere saecla vincere.
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07-10-05, 09:09 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| | You want to do what...?
Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: PRK
Posts: 12,052
| Repost! 
but still lovin' it!
__________________  : '97: 90K, 3xlock, 285 MT/Rs on steelies, Hanna sliders, 851+1.5"/863/N73/N74E/SD24, ARB bull with M12, Kaymar with duals, Kaymar rack, Slee TC skid, 2m/440, more stuff, loose nut behind the wheel!). Custom HD roo bar for sale!  : '03: 115K
DDs: Accord, Prius  : souped-up DR650 | |
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07-10-05, 09:47 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| | Forum Lifer
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 12,379
| first time i read it i recieved it from a lady in New Zealand... made me laugh both times... | |
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07-10-05, 10:34 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| | 250+ Club
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: CA Bay Area
Posts: 523
| Pretty dang funny all right.
__________________
When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty. -Thomas Jefferson
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07-10-05, 11:41 PM
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#5 (permalink)
| | She idles just fine
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Houston & BFE
Posts: 1,049
| Just call her "Ms. Maggot".
__________________
Sparkplugs are Irrelevant.
1984 BJ42; 1988 BJ73; & 1993 KZJ70
2004 R1150RT-P; 2002 GL1800A; 2000 R1150GS; 2002 KL250G; 1997 XR400R(sold to stinky); 1984 CT110; 1971 CT90K3; 1970 CT90K2; 1974 ST90
In Search of More Gubs . . .
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07-11-05, 02:50 AM
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#6 (permalink)
| | 250+ Club
Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Anderson, S.C.
Posts: 641
| Thats great!!!
I went to parris Island with a guy named Tug Jordan,
believe that shit or not! I wonder who wrote this little "story"?
__________________ MOMOKAWA- early FJ62- 1" shackle lift  , w/ 33"BFG A/T's
Proud member of Upstate Cruisers CLEMSON MAFIA TLCA #15219 | |
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07-11-05, 03:15 AM
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#7 (permalink)
| | still solving problems...
Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: uhhhh...duh...Northern CA
Posts: 5,421
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__________________ a couple pairs of pink panties...
Another convert to the Church of Latter Day Swank, a sub-cult of Shahrislam
"...Opportunity doesn't knock, you have to kick the fuckin door in and drag the bitch out screamin." -- Ullr
"I have more respect for people who change their views after acquiring new information than for those who cling to views they held thirty years ago. The world changes. Ideologues and zealots don't." - Michael Crichton | |
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07-11-05, 10:16 AM
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#8 (permalink)
| | Forum Lifer
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Nam, NC
Posts: 2,754
| Thats about the size of it too ( talking about city slickers i is )
__________________
Proud Patriot Guard Rider
It is the VETERAN , not the preacher, who has given us freedom of religion.
It is the VETERAN , not the reporter, who has given us freedom of the press.
It is the VETERAN , not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.
It is the VETERAN , not the campus organizer, who has given us freedom to assemble.
It is the VETERAN , not the lawyer, who has given us the right to a fair trial.
It is the VETERAN , not the politician, Who has given us the right to vote.
It is the VETERAN who salutes the Flag, It is the Veteran who serves under the Flag
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e9999
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