I know it wasn't funny to you at the time (or even now), but it was pretty dang funny to read!
You and (Idaho)Doug should write a book together or something.
And as someone already has mentioned somewhere you need to update your sig line and change it to something like:
"84 FJ60-acquired,
by far the worst day of my life"
Oh, and not to sound like some credit card company, but....
Buying a used '84 FJ60: $1,300 turning into $3,400.
Gaining wisdom after the whole ordeal:
PRICELESS!